"Who cares!"

"Who cares!"

Those two little words can mean so much. 

My eight year old has grown increasingly irritated with her 5-year-old sister. Who knows if it's peers or age or both. I'm no psychologist.

But I'm thinking Samantha learned a good lesson tonight. 

Last weekend I bought Alyssa a desk at a garage sale. She was so excited--a desk just like sissy's. I painted it and put it back in her room. Today I added the handles and lined the drawers. Alyssa was so excited. 

So after ballet, Alyssa ran to her room, waiting to show Sissy her new, finished desk. Samantha rolled her eyes and mumbled audibly, "Who cares!" Samantha did follow and take a peak but then proceeded to her room with a sigh.

Tonight before bed, I asked Al if he had seen Alyssa's finished desk yet. So we followed Alyssa to her room and Al asked if Samantha wanted to see it. There may have been eye rolling or a "who cares" somewhere between the kitchen and her bedroom. Alyssa's response was "It's okay, Dad. Sissy doesn't love me." It was so very nonchalant. 

Samantha just stood in the doorway, stunned. I looked at her as I was clearing off Alyssa's bed and said, "It hurts, huh?

"When you roll your eyes or say 'Who cares!' it doesn't go unnoticed."

Samantha put herself to bed. 

After I kissed Alyssa I went into Samantha's room to find her buried under the covers, crying and hurt. Of course she loves her sister.

It won't stop the eye rolling or the sighing, but maybe Samantha will attempt to hold her tongue.

Standing up

Al has been working in Samantha's (preschool) classroom since January. I helped in 2009, but since he's unemployed, it gives me more time to concentrate. Before it took half my workday and then I had to make it up during the week.

Quite a few of the girls have taken a liking to Al. The first day Samantha came home to tell me her friends have a crush on daddy and that daddy is "bald." It's not really something we talk about--it's just the way it is. Al has shaved his head since our wedding as he was sporting the Friar look. Not great in your 20s.

At any rate we talked about it at dinner, letting Samantha know that being bald is okay and that we shouldn't make fun of someone because of it. "I wouldn't like it if someone made fun of my poor eyesight and I'm sure it hurt daddy's feelings. Daddy is who he is."

After much thought, Samantha decided she didn't like it when her friends came up to her and said, "Your daddy's bald." So today she kindly asked her friends to stop saying that her daddy is bald because she doesn't like it and it hurts his feelings. I am so proud of her. I want her to be able to stand up to peer pressure and now is the time to start.

She was, however, very attached to daddy today. With the girls in her class vying for Al's attention, Samantha has become very jealous. I explained to her that no matter how much her friends want to be near daddy, she will always be his girl and that he loves her. He still had to pry her off his legs.

It's funny how we get so attached to our daddy. We always understand that mommy loves us unconditionally and maybe we do the same with daddy, but somehow we are so jealous. I remember a boy saying that my daddy liked him better than me. I was probably Samantha's age. I was so mad and jealous. I didn't want to share my daddy with anyone.