Today I gave Alyssa a breathing treatment to keep the bronchial cough under control. Where inhalant steroids don't affect Samantha's behavior, Alyssa turns into an angry toddler. I expect it, but it's still a bit unnerving and sometimes amusing. 

My mom and I took Alyssa to lunch. She was a bit argumentative at first, but soon after she had a hard time concentrating. She was hopping around in her seat, playing with her food in weird ways, and using odd objects as a bell. This is not my kid--she's pretty well behaved but has her moments as any five year old does; this was all steroids. 

My mom and I could not stop laughing. I sat her in my lap and bounced her like a baby to keep her occupied. I couldn't talk to her and expect her to follow along with any instructions. It got to the point where I just cleared everything off the table within her reach rather than tell her "no."

It's sad when the laughing stops and you think about the stuff that you have to give to your child. Both of my kids have had their share. I keep cases of three different breathing meds of inhalers and medicine for one of two nebulizers on hand at all times. We even use a makeup case to carry all the different meds with us. We also have two different forms of prednisone on hand at all times. At some points in their life theses meds have made all the difference.

I am hoping that we can remedy this situation in the future whether it be with surgery or a different approach. Not that I wish my kids would have surgery, but if taking out their adenoids or stomach surgery to tighten an esophagus removes all the steroids and antibiotics from the equation, then it'll be worth it. Their quality of life will improve. And I'll no longer be the mom that restricts my kids activities because of germs and fears of another infection/illness.

Today was chaotic and stressful. I started my first dose of a two-week cycle of prednisone in the last ditch attempt to get rid of the swelling in my hands. I'm not sure I'll be able to sleep tonight and that just isn't good because my mind will wander and I'll worry . . .

We met with Samantha's pediatric gastroenterologist today to discuss her chronic reflux and issues related to aspirating. Since 2010 I have charted that every summer she winds up with a bacterial infection in her lungs just days after swim lessons. We give her a high dose of prednisone for a few days and then taper along with antibiotics and a concoction of inhalers. Last year it was the worst yet and the poor kid started second grade on 60 mg of prednisone. She was an emotional wreck.

But it happened again this year like clockwork. Although we got on top of it within hours of the second cough, it still took three weeks to stop. And this time we noticed the prednisone had no effect, which meant there was something else going on.

Today the doctor politely said that we should have done an endoscopy three years ago. We were all hoping that Samantha would outgrow this, however. So next week we see an ENT to check her adenoids. And depending on what the ENT sees we will have an endoscopy within a few weeks with or without an adenoidectomy.

The results of the endoscopy will then determine if Samantha has to do a PH pump study and/or if she'll need surgery to tighten her esophageal sphincter.

It's all so scary. I don't even want to have my child put under for the endoscopy. But then if we can fix all this we may be able to get rid of the cases of Pulmicort, Xoponex, containers of steroids, and the bottles of antibiotics she takes every year. It could change her life . . . I have to keep that in perspective.

'Roids

So today was my last day of work before "vacation." Samantha had an appointment to make sure her breathing meds were on track and she was improving. A-okay, but the darn appointment was in Santa Cruz. We left at 10 and finally got home at 2:10. Just enough time to run in the house get the other child--Alyssa--and tote her off to the doctor while we waited another half hour. Ugh.

People are complaining left and right about how busy the grocery store and Target are before Christmas. Try getting seen by the doctor, folks. And I didn't bitch about it! (Now doesn't count.)

But I stuck it out because I couldn't imagine 4 days with my kids so unbearably sick that they look like they should be in the morgue (Alyssa). And once again mother's intuition won out. So Alyssa gets at least a week on steroids--oh, Lord! This kid has amazing energy on her worst day and steroids will just about double that. Holy smokes! I sure hope I'm ready for this because she's never been on the 'roids before. She could be hyper, which is hilarious, or the abominable snowman, which sucks.

I guess I'd better charge the video camera so I catch it all tomorrow when she starts to tear open those presents. So Santa, please don't put any coal in her stocking because she's really a good kid, but those 'roids . . . Try 'em sometime and you'll be as productive as you are now with a little Tooth Fairy and Easter Bunny mixed in.