January 1, 2014 . . . I spent this afternoon sewing curtains for my house with my mom. It was nice and bittersweet. Tomorrow she heads off to UCSF to get her first dose of chemotherapy. In a couple of weeks she'll lose her hair and in a month she'll have a stem-cell transplant.

It's rough for all of us. Right now she's fairly healthy, tomorrow she won't be.

My girls spent a few minutes getting in last minute hugs. They know that they won't be able to see her for a while. It's especially difficult because we live around the corner from her--literally four houses away.

Technology, however, will be our saving grace. We'll be trying to FaceTime with her as much as we can from UCSF or from our home to hers.

I'm so thankful for medical advances--she can use her own cells to save herself. But I can't still the worry/anxiety/sadness that I feel. I can see it in my dad's eyes when he looks away or tries to casually clear his throat or looks at me with red eyes.

Cancer sucks.